Out of the Box Coaching and Breakthroughs with the Enneagram, Mary R. Bast, Ph.D. Copyright © 1999. All rights reserved. Revised: January 15, 2012
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Positive Reframing (Click here for pdf version) Clarify Instead of "I know this isn't going to work!", probe for full understanding ("Tell me more. I'm not clear...") Confirm Instead of responding to unconfirmed assumptions, check them out ("Let me be sure I understand--you're saying that...") Give Credit Instead of focusing first on what you don't like ("What a stupid, pig-headed point of view!"), focus first on anything you like about their idea. Be Creative Instead of stating your concern as a barrier ("But it's doomed to failure because it will take too long!"), restate your concern as a potential positive outcome if it were addressed ("How could we assure that it is done in a short enough time?").
Positive Reframing (Click here for pdf version)
Clarify
Instead of "I know this isn't going to work!",
probe for full understanding ("Tell me more. I'm not clear...")
Confirm
Instead of responding to unconfirmed assumptions,
check them out ("Let me be sure I understand--you're saying that...")
Give Credit
Instead of focusing first on what you don't like ("What a stupid, pig-headed point of view!"),
focus first on anything you like about their idea.
Be Creative
Instead of stating your concern as a barrier ("But it's doomed to failure because it will take too long!"),
restate your concern as a potential positive outcome if it were addressed ("How could we assure that it is done in a short enough time?").
