JACKSONVILLE MAGAZINE
February 2006, page 43
Life Savers:
What the heck is a "life coach" and who really needs one?
WORDS BY KERRY SULLIVAN
A
woman--we'll call her Jane--was considering leaving her husband. She
had been unhappy for years and wanted out. The primary thing holding
her back was her finances. Could she survive on her own? What would
her lavish lifestyle be like on a budget? Jane asked herself these
questions a hundred times before picking up the phone and calling
for help.
Jane didn't call her best
friend. She didn't call a marriage counselor, or even a priest. She
called a life coach, a move that led many to ask her, "What is a
life coach?"
Dr. Mary Bast has heard
this question many times before. Bast is a life coach with a Ph.D.
in social psychology, but she isn't a shrink. "A coach isn't going
to deal with personality disorders or manic depression," she says.
Bast refers to her clients (not patients), as people who want a
change in their lives but don't feel they need therapy.
"Mostly people come to a
life coach when there's something they can't figure out how to make
happen or feel stuck. Or there is some type of transition in their
life, like a death or divorce or getting fired from a job," she
says. "I think of my work as helping people find resources they have
forgotten they have."
Bast moved to Gainesville
five years ago to continue her 15-year practice. Like many life
coaches, Bast almost never meets her clients. "I used to coach in
person, but what I like about doing it over the phone is I'm not
limited." She admits some of her clients, especially men, are more
open over the telephone because they aren't inhibited or embarrassed
by the face-to-face interaction when expressing their emotions. "A
lot of men won't go to a therapist but will hire a life coach
because there's not a stigma associated with them," she says.
According to the
International Coach Federation, through the process of coaching,
individuals focus on the skills and actions needed to successfully
produce their results. The individual chooses the focus of
conversation, while the coach listens and contributes observations
and questions as well as concepts and principles. Coaching can
accelerate the individual's process by providing greater focus and
awareness of possibilities leading to more effective choices.
Coaching concentrates on where individuals are now and what they are
willing to do to get where they want to be in the future.
To some, that all might
sound like a lot of Dr. Phil-meets-Oprah mumbo jumbo. Others may ask
if you really need to pay someone (fees generally range between $50
and $2250 per session) for simple advice. But Bast says there are
various reasons why someone might consult a coach. Perhaps there is
something at stake, a lack of confidence, a need of redirection in
work or life due to a setback, a lack of clarity or desire to be
better organized or more self-managing.
The truth is life coaching
is a relatively new professional service intended to help resolve
personal crises. In the early 1980s a financial planner living in
Phoenix named Thomas J. Leonard noticed that his clients sought his
advice not only on stocks and mutual funds but on professional and
personal matters. Recognizing the demand, Leonard changed gears from
being just a financial planner to a life planner. He continued
helping his clients, but by mapping out their personal lives as well
as their portfolios.
Leonard's formula caught
on, and in 1992, he founded Coach U, a service to train new coaches,
primarily via the Internet. In 1995, the Internal Coach Federation
was created. The federation oversees credentialing, training
accreditation, and a code of professional ethics. The ICF is the
largest non-profit professional association worldwide of personal
and business coaches with more than 8,000 members and 132 chapters
in 334 countries.
How long one hires a life
coach depends on the individual. Bast, for example, prefers to set
limits with her clients, say three to six months. "I do have a few
exceptions. Sometimes my clients' goals change and they stay with me
a few years," she says. "I had a woman who came to me because of
problems with her business. Well, then her son went off to college
and then she was diagnosed with breast cancer, so we worked on all
of those issues at different times in her life."
A male client of Bast's
felt undervalued at his job. The two worked together to bring more
attention to him at the office, gain more satisfaction from what he
does, and to stand out from his co-workers. Bast did this by
assigning her client homework. She asked the man to send her a
one-line email every day of something he noticed that kept him
invisible. "After we collected some data, I told him I wanted him to
make one small change. It doesn't take much of a change when
breaking a lifelong pattern."
Remember Jane, the
soon-to-be divorcée? Her decision was a lot easier after she spoke
to a life coach. She says all she needed to do was say it out loud
to someone who would listen. The life coach didn't tell her whether
to leave her husband or not. What the coach did do was discuss
career and financial goals and make sure she understood the
consequences, just in case she decided to become single again.
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Hey,
Coach?
Seven
questions to ask before you hire a life coach.
According to
the International Coach Federation, the most important
aspect to consider when seeking a life coach is finding
someone with whom you feel you can easily relate and
create a powerful partnership. To do that you may want
to ask the following questions:
-
What is
your coaching experience?
-
What is
your coach specific training? Do you hold an ICF
Credential, or are you enrolled in an ICF Accredited
Training Program?
-
What are
your coaching specialties or client areas in which
you most often work?
-
What specialized skills or
experience do you bring to your coaching?
-
What is your philosophy of
coaching?
-
What is your specific process for
coaching? How often would we meet and for how long?
And how are you paid?
-
Do you have any coaching success
stories?
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